When following a recipe, ignore terms like cream, blend, whip, beat, fold, stir, and sift. Just dump the stuff into a big bowl and bash at it with a tablespoon (that's the big one, remember?) until it's all mixed up.Your oven will never know the difference.
Lots of food has what's called a shelf life. That means it don't last forever. Be aware of this and eat things before they grow legs and walk away. Rotate your fruits and veggies (you are buying fruits and veggies, aren't you?) and keep an eye on your leftovers. In fact, write dates on your to-go boxes and throw them out if they get a couple weeks old. Take-out Chinese does not age as well as you might expect or hope.
However, some things can still be eaten fairly late in the game. In particular, overripe apples make good apple butter and mushy brown bananas make terrific banana bread. Find good recipes for apple butter and banana bread and learn to make them. Don't worry about cream, whip, blend and all that, just throw the stuff together and it'll turn out just fine. Trust me.
The directions for heating frozen foods are always for a microwave you don't have, so ignore them. Instead, nuke for two minutes and check. If it's not hot enough, do it again. Repeat until you're hungry enough to eat it anyway. Note that "nuke" is the only microwave setting you'll ever need.
If you're like Southern Man and have kids that deign to visit on occasion, keep plenty of kid food in the house. Southern Man's girls are content with Easy Mac and Kid Cusine and his son will eat canned clam chowder and ramen noodles and all will eat various flavors of Hamburger Helper. Find out what your kids like and keep plenty of it around. Also keep candy and chips and popcorn and ice cream and their favorite drinks in the house. You do want them to come back, don't you?
Learn to cook one meal well. You never know when you'll need to entertain and guests are impressed if you can actually produce something in the kitchen. Spaghetti is relatively foolproof, especially if you grab a loaf of hot garlic bread on the way home, make the sauce by dumping a jar or two of the cheap stuff into a pound of browned and drained hamburger meat, and buy Caesar salad mix in the bag. Dry spaghetti can sit in the pantry forever but don't forget about shelf life on that salad. No one is impressed by brown Romaine.