Grand Prize

Another day, another new car dealer to visit...to collect the grand prize!

I'm serious. The mail piece had one of those scratch-off things (little silver cases just like on Deal or No Deal - one wonders if the copyright police will notice) and when I dutifully scratched 'em off I found that I had won the grand prize. Wow. Imagine that. I double-checked the name on the piece and sure enough it said "Southern Man or current resident" and that's me.

A careful search of the fine print revealed that the "grand prize" was in fact a $1000 Internet shopping spree. Given that this was the only prize description on the piece one begins to suspect that there may be a lot of grand prize winners out there. However, there's not much Southern Man likes better than to spend someone else's money on the net, so he ventured to the local Dodge dealership to check it out.

He did waste a salesman's time for a bit looking at a slightly used Dakota and then made off with the goods. Turns out you go to this web site here and pick out a thousand bucks worth of crap and they mail it right to you. Except there's a shipping and handling fee associated with each piece of crap, in an amount roughly equal to what the same crap would sell for at Wal-Mart.

And the crap was so...well, crappy that Southern Man couldn't even give that crap away. Best refusal was by one secretary who took a look, laughed, and said "I may dress like trailor park trash but not even I would be seen in any of that crap."

Score so far: cheap four piece luggage set and a crappy grand prize. But the Buick test drive for the $50 gift card is yet to come...